Bloganuary Day #13 Prompt: “What does your ideal day look like?”

It's amazing. All the different ways becoming a mother changes EVERYTHING. From your hygiene and elimination habits (see my previous post: my favorite emoji), to what you wear, to what you think about when laying awake at 01:00AM. I used to fall asleep whenever I wanted, wake up whenever I wanted (unless I had work), … Continue reading Bloganuary Day #13 Prompt: “What does your ideal day look like?”

Lost Shoe Anthologies 006: Tie Dye Croc

“How did Christmas Eve creep up so quickly?” wondered ‘Bastien to himself. He struggled to form complete thoughts through the ganja haze clogging up his cerebellum. Right now, he could pass as a smooth-brained-mouse. Incapable of deep thought and happy to eat cheese under the boardwalk. In fact, that’s what he was doing. ‘Bastien (short … Continue reading Lost Shoe Anthologies 006: Tie Dye Croc

The Origins of Ding Dong Ditch

Between five and seven million years ago, humans, or humanoid apes, came into existence. Lumbering about on two legs, they were different from the other apes we know and love today. We can get a good idea about what they looked like by watching the 1968 Planet of the Apes starring our dearly departed, Charlton … Continue reading The Origins of Ding Dong Ditch

Lost Shoe Anthologies 005: Brown Ballet Flat

Jennifer was a slice of vanilla wholesome-ness. Classic 1950’s American female in 2021: predictable and boring… static. She set her alarm even when she didn’t have a reason to get up early and was promptly in bed, face cream in place, by 0900PM every night. Even on the freakin’ weekend. Let’s just say, she wasn’t … Continue reading Lost Shoe Anthologies 005: Brown Ballet Flat

Lost Shoe Anthologies 004: Timberland Work Boot

Another day, another back ache. And finger ache from smashing it yesterday with a rubber mallet. Oh, and an eye ache from getting metal shavings thrown in it like glitter on stripper tits. The list goes on and on. Mike was exhausted. Worn out. Mike had very little will to get in his truck and … Continue reading Lost Shoe Anthologies 004: Timberland Work Boot

Lost Shoe Anthologies 003: Adidas Slide Sandal

She was running late. Again. What the fuck?! Why couldn’t she just have a moment to herself. Time to pluck her chin hairs, dig the schmutz out from under her toenails, stare at the beautiful display of travel-sized toiletries at Target? These are all things she desperately longed for. Mundane. Predictable. Independent. Nope! Beatrice, Bea … Continue reading Lost Shoe Anthologies 003: Adidas Slide Sandal

Lost Shoe Anthologies 002: Brown Loafer

Pete Walker. A solid American, white, male name. It conveyed predictability. It promised permeating dullness. He chose it for that reason. So nobody knew what lurked beneath his deceiving facade.  Pete was putting the finishing touches on the contract he had spent the past one week perfecting. This would be the contract that earned him … Continue reading Lost Shoe Anthologies 002: Brown Loafer

Lost Shoe Anthologies 001: Grey New Balance

Coach had been particularly hard on you this practice. Did you do something wrong? You, Brady Jensen, the star of the Co-Ed Centreville High School Wrestling Team, could do no wrong. So, obviously Coach just had a stick up his ass. Had his wife not blown him last night? Was his hemorrhoid leaking hemoglobules into … Continue reading Lost Shoe Anthologies 001: Grey New Balance